The Feeling of Failure
by Fightforourlives
Summary: What happened after the fight on Mustafar between Anakin and Obi-wan? How would they recover from the emotional scares that come from a battle like that? No-slash
1. Forgotten Pain

I don't own Star Wars. All the characters belong to their original creators/owners, I'm just using them for creative purposes with no monetary gain.

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Ok here is what I was thinking. I know that at this point Anakin and Padme` are married, but I figured that a great cover up would be that Anakin still lives with Obi-wan part of the time this way it's not as noticeable when he is with padme because Obi-wan still says he is living with him like he is a padawan, which also means that I think Obi-wan knows about the marriage as well. Anyway there is my little ramble thanks for reading J

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Chapter 1

Forgotten Pain

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Obi-wan woke in a normal fashion, the sun shone through the windows, the apartment was quite, as if nothing had happened. He didn't remember that his best friend his brother was no longer there. He rose stiffly from his bed but this didn't surprise him he was always stiff. He walked down the hall to the fresher, he took a quick shower and got dressed for the day, " _I'm getting too old for this"_ , he thought to himself, as every muscle in his body ached and then walked out to the kitchen. He found no Anakin there, but this didn't surprise him Anakin always slept in. He started to cook breakfast for the two of them. He figured once the smells floated through their quarters Anakin would arrive, as he always did, but Anakin didn't show up he didn't even hear a sound coming from the other bedroom. _"Hum… that's strange_ " Obi-wan thought to himself. He sat down at the table to eat and then thought " _no, I should go check on Anakin_ ". He rose from his seat at the table and entered Anakin's room he glanced in and found that there was no Anakin there, but stranger then that his bed was made as if no one had slept there. He stood there puzzled for a minute, thinking, then it all came flooding back. The fight, the argument, padme's death, but the scene that haunted him the most was when he just left Anakin burning on Mustafar, he realized in a flash that he didn't know whether his friend was dead or alive. He felt as though he was just punched in the chest. He walked to Anakin's bed sat down and put his head in his hands. "Jedi don't cry", he tried to tell himself, but he couldn't take it any longer he began to sob. The man he knew better than anyone else was gone, whether he was dead or alive that was unknown but he knew that he would never see Anakin, the Anakin he knew, ever again.

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He didn't know how long he sat there thinking, but next time he looked at the com unit he saw it read 1600 hours. "Yikes! I was supposed to meet Master Yoda at 1200" he thought to himself, but didn't even consider moving from where he was. At that very moment he heard a knock on the door. "Come" he yelled, but still move. He knew whoever it was if they needed to talk to him they'd find him eventually. He heard Anakin's door open, you can always tell when Anakin's door opens since it squeaks, Obi-wan looked up to see Master Yoda standing there.

"Hello, Master Yoda", Obi-wan said,

but he would not look at the little green fellow standing just inside Anakin's door.

"Hurting, you are." Yoda said,

taking one step closer to the bed. "I should have listened to the counsel in the beginning, he should never have been trained…" Obi-wan trailed off. He glanced at Yoda then returned to starring at the floor.

"Change the past, you cannot. Change the future, you can", Yoda said.

The little man by now was standing right in front of obi wan. How can I change the future? He's gone, I don't even know if he's alive, I left him on that mountain, just burning. Obi-wan said as he put his head in his hands.

"Alive in body, he is. Alive in spirit, he is not." Yoda stated plainly.

Obi wan finally looked him in the eye "but how am I to change his future if he's dead in spirit" Obi-wan tried to control his tears but a couple came sliding down his cheek he hoped Master Yoda wouldn't notice.

Revive a spirit, you can. Revive a body, you cannot. Yoda said, looking straight at Obi-wan.

Obi-wan looked up "but how will I ever get him to listen to me" he said looking straight into Yoda's face.

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Ok there is chapter one. Hope you all enjoyed it, this is my first Star Wars fic and I'm still trying to get my bearings so reviews would be greatly appreciated. I would love to hear any ideas, I'm really trying to improve my writing, thanks.

God bless


	2. The Thoughts of a Traitor

Chapter 2

The thoughts of a traitor

Hey everyone! Sorry for the long wait. I was trying to finish another fanfic and now that it is completed im going to try to work on this one. Hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer- I don't own StarWars! If I did, do you think Anakin would have become Darth Vador?

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Anakin awoke, he looked up, then he thought he was dreaming. He closed his eyes and tried again. This must be a dream.

 _Why can all I see looks like a holographic video?_ He thought to himself.

He lifted his hands to his face to try to clear his vision only to find that there was a mask/helmet on his head. Why am I wearing a helmet his thoughts began to race..

 _What is going on here?_

 _Where is Obi-wan?_

 _Wait! Where am I?!_

He began to panic, he sat up then he jumped to feet, but then something happened, he fell to the floor in a heap. He laid there trying to figure out what had just happened. He slowly lifted himself to a sitting position and gently attempted to straighten his legs, they worked kind of,

 _why don't they move right?_ he thought to himself.

As he sat there thinking a medical droid came into his room and stood there staring at him and then left the room. He thought to himself,

 _that didn't look like one of the republic medical droids._

"What the heck is going on here!"

he tried to shout, but no sound came. His throat felt like it was on fire, like he was in a burning building.

"Burning…."

The word hit him like a ton of bricks. His memory grabbed the word and ran with it, flashing moments of the battle with Obi-wan, Padme's crying face and worse of all Obi-wan's final statement

 **"I loved you, Anakin".**

He shuddered as if he had just heard the words spoken, those words cut into him like a hundred knifes. He stared at the floor he wanted to cry but nothing happened. He just sat there alone, mentally and physically he felt as though he was an orphan. He felt like he had that first night under Gui-gon's rule. Alone with nothing to his name and nothing to life for, even though back then he really did, now he felt truly alone he had no idea how he gotten to this place or even if he was free or a prisoner. He sat there for who knows how long before the medical droid came back. With the medical droid was the chancellor. The Chancellor walked to where Anakin was sitting and sat down beside him. He spoke somewhat softly

"Anakin, I'm guessing you don't remember what happened yesterday, do you Darth Vader?

Anakin looked into the Chancellor's eyes. As he starred at him through these weird lenses everything came back in full color the turn, Padme's deception, the fight with Obi-wan, but most of all he felt a hatred towards the light like he never had before. He felt so angry at Obi-wan, he was sure that Obi-wan had betrayed him.

"Yes, Master I do remember." Anakin finally answered the Chancellor's question.

"Good", said the Chancellor, "Do you still intend to follow through?"

Anakin started racking his brain,

 _follow through with what?_ he thought to himself.

The Chancellor noticing his slight confusion said,

"Ahh, well I figured you might not remember, your plan to kill Obi-wan, Yoda, and the light that way you can reign forever."

Anakin looked straight at the Chancellor "Yes, master I do want to continue towards that."

"Well then what are we waiting for?" asked the Chancellor. "I know you can get up" the Chancellor rose to his feet.

Anakin thought that he could never walk on these things they are saying are his legs, but he decided to try anyway. He slowly pulled his legs under him the ever so gently put one foot on the ground and then heaved himself up.

"Good, Good!" exclaimed the Chancellor.

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Hope you enjoyed it! Please review? I would love to improve my writing.

God Bless, have a great day. J


	3. The End of it All

As normal I do not claim any rights to Star Wars or anything related to the movies, TV Programs or the like. I am making no money from this work or any work of its kind, and all recognizable characters belong to there respectable creators and/or owner.

A/N That being said, I hope you enjoy this little piece of the story. Yesssss…. I… Know… it has been a year since I have uploaded for this story, or any story for that matter and I am truly sorry. It has been quite a rough chunk of time and yeah I am not really going to talk about it since it is just of unnecessary mumbo jumbo.

 **Ok that was not important but this is** **should I continue this story?** **I have the next several chapters written** **J**

Obi-wan stayed in Anakin's room all night. Yoda had left to start working on arrangements for Padme's funeral. Then they needed to decide what to do with Anakin's children. Obi-wan still was in shock he couldn't fathom the fact that his best friend, his brother in a sense, was gone and he knew he would never be the same again. He was exhausted but he couldn't sleep he wanted to cry he just couldn't come to grips with it he felt like a failure he had failed the counsel,

Gui-gon and the most of all he had failed Anakin. He felt like it was his fault that Anakin had turned. He knew deep down inside that it wasn't but he still couldn't shake the feeling that he was really the one to blame. He continued to sit on Anakin's bed. He heard a noise and jumped up off the bed reached down for his lightsaber and realized it wasn't there. " _Darn! I must have never put it on_." Obi-wan thought to himself then he noticed his lightsaber, sitting on Anakin's bed, he grabbed it and turned it on and got ready for whatever was coming.

Yoda walked in, saw Obi-wan with his lightsaber and giggled, "prepared to fight, I am not." Yoda said continuing to giggle. Obi-wan lowered his saber embarrassed "Sorry master Yoda I should have known it was you" said Obi-wan. "ready to go, Are you?" Master Yoda asked. "Ready? For what?" asked Obi-wan his brain was not functioning much, if at all. "To the funeral, We must go." Obi-wan sunk to the bed _the funeral, Padme's funeral it would be like losing the rest of Anakin the brother, the son, the best friend he used to know_ Obi-wan thought to himself. Yoda watched Obi-wan for a minute he noticed all the signs of emotional pain he had also felt it through the force. Some days, he wished that the force would just leave him alone but, instead, no it was always there always showing him things that needed help. "Let's go, Come on", said Yoda, "first change, You must." Obi-wan rose slowly from Anakin's bunk, he let Yoda lead him through the living room and kitchen to his room and left him there saying "get ready, you must". Obi-wan was again left with his thoughts. He got ready a lot slower then he normally would, he truly felt like acting like a padawan and throwing a tantrum but he knew he couldn't do that. He put on his best tunic and walked out of his bedroom. When he first came out he didn't see Yoda anywhere well that is strange he thought to himself. He then noticed Yoda standing in the living room staring at something on the datacase Obi-wan walked over, he noticed what Yoda was looking at. Obi-wan thought he might collapse; Yoda was looking at the only image he had of Anakin. He would have had more but Anakin always told he that attachment would break him someday, since it was forbidden anyway. _I guess he was right_ Obi-wan thought to himself.

Yoda looked at Obi-wan. Yoda had felt his heavy presence as soon as Obi-wan had come out of the bedroom he had felt it through the walls of the temple but not like this… He felt like just Obi-wan's presence could crush a small transport. Yoda sighed, he felt as though Obi-wan was gone… as if his soul had died. Then he felt something different _good_ Yoda thought, then he realized, the change was even deeper despair. Yoda sighed again… he looked over his shoulder at Obi-wan. "get going, Let us" Yoda said emphatically leaving no room for discussion. Yoda walked out of Obi-wan's quarters and Obi-wan followed. Obi-wan didn't want to follow Yoda but he knew he had to. He followed Yoda all through the temple. Even though the temple had been cleaned since the attack a strange "feeling" hung over the space as if it had been abandoned. _Oh yeah, it is,_ Obi-wan remembered, he shuddered at the memory. They arrived at the funeral. Everyone who could come safely did, this made Obi-wan realize what she had meant to so many people and other creatures. "She was a good queen and an even better senator", everyone was saying. _She would have been a good mother too,_ Obi-wan thought to himself. Thankfully, the funeral passed quickly Obi-wan didn't know how much more he could have taken. Walking alone back to his quarters, he thought about all the times he had had with Anakin and Padme. He held it together, his face showing no emotion not that anyone saw him, the temple was quiet, too quiet. As he made it to his quarters he opened the door, he hadn't bothered to lock, since it's not like anyone was around to break in. He came in, walked to his bedroom, fell into the bed, (without bothering to change) and fell instantly into a fitful sleep.


End file.
